What is the definition of toxic? According to dictionary.com, toxic means (adj.) "causing unpleasant feelings; harmful or malicious". Now, keeping that in mind you can see how imperative it is to keep your distance from toxic people. It is important to guard your peace of mind and heart at all times. And as I reflect on life, I've come across a number of people that I don't like to associate with: the complainer, the antagonist, and the war lord.
The first toxic person that I've come in contact with is the complainer. One thing you can experience being around this person is taking on the same type of spirit that they have. Case in point, you ever been around someone who complains...ALL THE TIME!? Its almost like if they don't have something to complain about their world wouldn't be right. There will be times, after being in their presence for an extended period of time (sometimes its unavoidable as you may work with them or be related to them), you find yourself starting to complain too. Has that ever happened to you? You may not be the type to necessarily complain a lot, but if an issue arises you might state it but not really go on a long tirade about it. So guard your ears when you get around this person. And before you start to talk, ask yourself if this is really worth the share. We are all dealing with our own issues...and rarely do we want to take on someone else's as well.
Second, there are some toxic people who have this knack for always having something to say about someone else (or just everything in general). Yes, the antagonist. You come around them and they run down their list about so and so, and this and that. And trust and believe, when you aren't around they are most likely talking about you too. If you find yourself around this type of toxic person make sure you keep what you say to a minimum. They will be quick to repeat you. So as soon as you get the, "What you think about them?" you know thats the set-up, because once they are around someone else the first thing they'll say is, "Well, Stephie said...". No, Stephie, didn't say anything, thank you very much!
The last toxic person I'll discuss is the one that will take out all of their aggression on others they deem weaker then them. The war lord. Why? Because they feel they can. They walk around and make everyone around them miserable because they get off on it. To me they're the worst kind of toxic person. They create an atmosphere where they literally suck all of the joy out of the room. They can be mean and condescending, on purpose. This is far more than creating drama like the antagonist would. No, the wounds they create cut way deeper. I avoid these folks at all cost. Not because I'm scared of them, but because they just go against everything that I believe in. And Laney didn't raise her daughter to be that way! Lol. Besides, the minute I get a good read on someone and see what they're really about (and its not pleasant), you don't have to worry about me. But you sure won't treat me like you do other people. The devil is a liar! But most people think I'm mean so they don't bother me too much. I'm not mean of course, but my resting face can shoo people away I suppose *shrugs*. (Ain't I a mess?! Lol).
The one thing all of these toxic people have in common is that they are draining. They take and take without any regard for others. You are legit tired just from dealing with them. Bringing it to their attention is like standing at a wall telling it how you feel about it. It does absolutely nothing and they'll just turn it around to be YOUR problem and not theirs. This is one of the reasons why I tend to stay to myself. I have a set number of folks that I deal with, and I'm perfectly fine with that. (But of course I'm an introvert so I don't like being around people anyway...lol! I'm just weird, but thats another story for another day though).
In all, I have learned to leave toxic people behind. My peace of mind comes first. I treat people the way I would expect to be treated (Golden Rule), with kindness and respect. The moment I see that I can't get that from you is the last time we have to interact, unless absolutely necessary. All I know is if my whole personality and attitude changes for the worst because of someone else, either they or I have to go. My tolerance for nonsense is quite low y'all...I just can't.
Do you know of any other toxic people to avoid? What are some ways you've dealt with these people? Drop a line below and let me know. Until next time folks, stay sane out there!
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